Umbrellas!! This may be my new swear word substitute. I've never liked umbrellas and, it seems, they don't like me.
Yesterday, in Morries, I had to park a long, long way from the store because there were lots of people panic buying stuff. It was raining heavily, so, rather than go shopping looking like a drowned rat (my Mum's expression) I rummaged around in the car and found an umbrella, which may have been my Mum's. Its one of those little handbag-sized brollies that folds down into 3 parts and, I don't think its ever been opened up.
Has to be simple, thought I, as I pushed and pulled on the spokes, getting more wet by the second. I took cover in the trolley parking area so that I could pretend I just there for a trolley and not to fight with a silly little umbrella.
Finally, it was up and I trundled trolley and brolly to the store. Stopped just outside, gave the brolly a good shake and tried to collapse it.........and I tried and I tried.......and failed. Somewhat embarrassed, I plonked the brolly in the trolley, where it formed a roof, and pushed it into the store, to get away from the queue of shoppers that had built up behind me, .
Its said to be unlucky to put an umbrella up indoors but, for me, this was not so. Under the beady eye of the store security man, I managed to collapse the brolly and put it back in a corner of the trolley. That's it, I thought, I know how to do this- it won't happen again.
Of course it did happen again - on the way back to the car - and, in disgust, I chucked the brolly, still up, on top of my shopping in the back of the car and came home - and that's where it stayed overnight.
Today, I went out to pick up a few small freebies and was invited to take anything I wanted from the piles of stuff in the living room (house moving time). I chose 2 sets of plastic drawers on castors (for the GH), carried one lot to the car, opened the hatchback and there, laughing at me, was the blessed umbrella!
The husband of the house was beside me, with the other set of drawers. He took one look at the umbrella, worked a spell, and the thing folded down neatly.
I felt like one of those stoopid old biddies who can't even close an umbrella. Please tell me I'm not the only one who struggles with them (if you're still awake
).