G&G Magazine

Nutty idea.
Imagine that you are copywriters for a new gardening magazine/newspaper to be called "Garden & Gossip".
Can you write an article or Letter to the Editor or any content that you think will entertain or amuse the Magazine's readers? Maybe a Quiz or puzzle, a handy tip or anything really - you can even submit some spoof advertising. Photographs are, of course welcome as they fill more space on the pages.

Over to you, let's see what our first edition (and probably the last) will contain. 

Dear Sir,

I very much enjoyed the first edition of your new magazine, but felt it somewhat lacked content. I notice at present you have bulked out the magazine with adverts. A great many of these seem to feature an attractive blonde lady in a swimsuit either stepping into or out of a walk-in bath via its side door. Is this an indication of the readership you are hoping to attract?

Dear Moth,

Thank you for your letter. As this is our first edition we have been reliant on our contributors for content and to our advertisers for supporting our new magazine.
In order to reach a wide and varied audience, we will only advertise products which are suitable for our readers. The adverts to which you refer have been modified to make them appeal to many of our readers. The Editorial Board are of the opinion that the original images of an attractive blonde, "naked" lady stepping into a bath was more suited to Page 3 of certain newspapers. We have therefore, photoshopped in a swimsuit - even though the idea of wearing a swimsuit in the bath is, frankly, ridiculous.
May I invite you to write an article for the magazine.

I think there should definitely be a section on how to fill you garden cheaply or free.
With seed swaps/ circles. Taking cuttings or sales & reduced sections anywhere plants are sold.

And a section on how to avoid the big seed companies 

I think there should definitely be a section on how to fill you garden cheaply or free.
With seed swaps/ circles. Taking cuttings or sales & reduced sections anywhere plants are sold.

And a section on how to avoid the big seed companies 

Would you like to write an article, SC? The "magazine" needs experts to write for it.

I’ll give it a go     . When’s the first pretend edition going out? Other commitments tomorrow ( milling   ).

First edition to be issued in July.

Dear Editor,

I hope you have an advice page, as I need some sensible advice. I have a very large tree stump which has resisted all efforts to remove it. The gentleman who lives next door informs me he has a nephew who works for the military in foreign parts in the capacity of bomb disposal. He assures me that in exchange for a carrier bag of courgettes, some ripe tomatoes and a quantity of strawberry jam this nephew can be persuaded to liberate an IED on my behalf, which, he says, willl surely remove the stump. My question is this, what time of day do you advise as the least likely to disturb the neighbours? (I live in an urban environment). I enclose a photo of the stump so you may see the size of the problem.

   

Looking forward to your reply.

I do hope there'll be an appropriate cookery section.

1000 Original Recipes for Courgettes.

Can Aphid Encrusted Artichokes be Considered Vegetarian?

Vole-au-Vents and Other Budget Dishes

Summer Recipes for those Winter Squash that Refuse to Rot